Explore the Six Pillars
“Every single one of us is born with the power to shape our lives and our reality through the tenacity of our thoughts. When our thoughts become filled with clarity, conviction, and courage – your outer world can and will shift the way you want it to, to mirror your inner transformation.”
~Melanie Santostefano, author, Thoughts Become Things – Six Pillars to Guide You Through Life.
Through “Thoughts Become Things: Six Pillars to Guide You Through Life,” author Melanie Santostefano shares short stories about eight individuals who deeply influenced her life and shaped who she is today through their fine examples on how to live a life with meaning. Her hope is that, using the Six Pillars a foundation, others can either adopt them or find their own to lead a more fulfilled and purpose-driven life. Melanie is a sought-after keynote speaker to share the lessons from her book to inspire, motivate and empower others to reach their goals and dreams through the strength of their thoughts – with Pillars as the foundation.
Pillar 1 - Honor
Inspired by Melanie’s aunt, Karen Wetzel Santostefano, and mentor/spiritual father, Harold “Hank” Ellman. Each of these individuals saved Melanie at times when she was in dire need of guidance, support, and old-fashioned love. Each not only lived their lives with Honor, but honored Melanie as well – while providing a haven of safety and emotional support through truly turbulent times.
Live with Honor for yourself and others, and see all the gifts and blessings that will come to you. Remember, we are made strong only for a while, to help one another.
Pillar 2 - Humility
Melanie draws inspiration from her cousin and spiritual sister, Suzanne Casey Lavin, and from Tommy Kaider, a man she still loves deeply. Both were bootstrappers who achieved much while living with humility. Their sudden deaths in 2018 — Tommy on April 20 at age 42, and Suzanne less than 24 hours later on April 21 at age 50 — brought Melanie to her knees in grief and left her questioning why. From that loss, she came to see humility as a grounding force in her own life.
Live with Humility; we all fail and lose – through this understanding and ownership, we can be vulnerable and establish deeper connections with our world/the people in it.
Pillar 3 - Gratitude
Embodied by her beloved Italian grandmother, Elena Patrassi Santostefano, Melanie learned as a young girl how the simple things in Elena’s life led to her immense happiness and satisfaction. This angel from above needed very little: her family, her garden, the local grocery store to prepare family meals, and her church, where she celebrated her deep faith. She lived for Sunday evenings when everyone would gather at her table for her traditional Italian family dinner.
Live with Gratitude; the sun will be brighter, the wind softer, accomplishments greater/more meaningful, and you will gain a greater sense of thankfulness for the things you do have.
Pillar 4 - Grit
Melanie’s great-grandmother, Mary Anne Dyer, modeled the strength and courage that continue to inspire her. At 19, Mary Anne became a widow. The next day, she gave birth to a daughter. Living in rural Ireland with little money and many mouths to feed, she faced impossible choices. Her mother urged her to go to America, where she settled in Boston. She worked here for seven years, sending money home to support her struggling family and the young daughter she had to leave behind.
Live with Grit; realize you can do what needs to be done, no matter how challenging, difficult or painful – for the sake/good of others, and ultimately, yourself.
Pillar 5 - Faith
Melanie’s grandmother, Evelyn Casey, leaned on her deep faith during one of the hardest choices of her life. Ten months after losing an infant son, John James, she gave birth to another child, Evelyn Concepta, who was frail and not expected to survive. Believing it was the only way to save her daughter, she entrusted the baby to her own mother, Mary Anne, whose care gave Evelyn Concepta a chance at life.
Live with Faith in your decisions and actions; commit to them, believe in them, and make them work for the greater good by controlling the perspective you take on them.
Pillar 6 - Forgiveness
Melanie’s mother, Evelyn McDonagh, was born in Ireland and emigrated to the U.S. at 19. From her, Melanie learned many lessons—the most valuable being the power of Forgiveness. After a painful divorce, Evelyn reunited with her first love in Ireland and returned “home,” a choice that left Melanie devastated and burdened by hurt for 13 years. Eventually, she realized she couldn’t move forward without forgiving her mother. Releasing that weight opened her heart and gave her the strength to embrace what she now sees as her true purpose.*
Live with Forgiveness close to your heart; holding on to pain/resentments will hold you down and deprive you of all types of success. Set yourself free, and you will reach new heights.
*That purpose for Melanie is to share her story, and to help others empower themselves to reflect on the people and the experiences that have made them who they are, and to form them into Pillars for themselves that provide the needed foundation for creating a purposeful and meaning-filled life. And, if there is no satisfaction and happiness in one’s life, to seek these things by enabling their Thoughts on who they are and who they want to become – either personally or professionally (or both) to Become Things.